LSW 1804 Hang Hau


Another hot and dry summer run for the LSW but I'm not complaining - hot weather is certainly better than rain which will mean crappy markings and the pack running around in circles (a bit like Bobbledick's last run which coincidentally started from the same place). This time, the hares didn't even bother having "A" at a park; it was literally at Exit A2 of Hang Hau station. The rush hour crowd exiting the MTR station couldn't help but stare at us, with Creme Brulee and 3FM giving the audience a treat when they changed into their running gear. After a feeble attempt to explain the markings, the hares Come into my Tunnel and Toilet Spray chased us off.

As expected, the markings in the urban area were crap. One blob of flour on Po Lam Road after the roundabout and then.... nothing. The "on on" call came about 5 minutes later on the concrete trail heading up, allowing the latecomer Chatroom Paedophile to catch up. Past a check then up the steps into the dirt trail with FRBs Inflato, Paul and Gobi Lo leading the pack. At this point Inflato muttered under his breath "This is about as far as we got on Bobbledick's run before we got terribly lost" and I silently thanked my lucky stars that I skipped that run a few months ago.

Another check at the top of the steps which took Inflato left and Gobi Lo right. Inflato got it wrong unfortunately and that was the last I ever saw of the pack till the u-turn (more of that later). It was a nice contour trail with a slight uphill, then more checks, more uphills and a dense portion of shiggy. It has been a very long time since I had cuts and scratches on my legs. I had to clear many a cobweb before I got to the second Rambos/Wimps split, beyond which was the (now) (in)famous u-turn as explained by the hares earlier on.

It was a good hard scramble up the ridge then onto Razor Hill proper. Was it worth it going all the way up there only to see the words "You are at the top" and "U-turn"? Not really, but the fine views of the city and Clear Water Bay did the job. Very zen. Well, at least until I went down the hill and met Paul, Inflato, 3FM, Chatroom, Ruggero and Creme Brulee (in that order) huffing and puffing and asking me if they should go all the way up. I said yes.

Back to the split where I saw HP Salsa. I'm not sure if he was admiring the views or catching his breath but he sure could do with a beer just about then. Down on the Wimps trail, past Yummy Mummy (looking fabulous - how does she do it running in 33 degrees heat and 100% humidity?!) and Elsa, then AFWD and Buttfan further down. The two girls were having one of their profound discussions about life in general - as usual - and I wondered how much faster they would be if they weren't talking. Nina (ADWD's not-sunburnt dog) was up ahead and if Lemondrop was here, would surely give him a run for his money as the hash's FRDB (Front Running Dog Bastard).

In the last stretch home I caught up with a well-tanned Castrato just back from France, looking like he had a bit too much cheese and wine while away. Down to the roundabout at Po Hong Road where markings once again became scarce. Priscilla looked a bit lost here but with two pairs of eyes looking for chalk markings we got back home quickly after.

So in spite of the anal park wardens/officials who obviously have no clue what the chemical composition of chalk is and who are seriously in need of a chill pill and a good lay, it was another excellent run by the Tunnel/Toilet combo. Thank you hares!

Alternative write-up: Hang Hau - Razor Hill - (U-Turn) - Po Lam

Down Downs by Gobi Lo:

Hares - great run with amazing views on Razor Hill

Hares - no toilets at A, hashers have to change in full public view

Hares - first u-turn on the trail in LSW history

Hares - awful markings in urban areas but great markings on the trails

3FM and Hopeless - they keep an excel file to see when they are free to have date night

HP Salsa - only $20 left in wallet, unable to pay for dinner

Castrato - returnee

Castrato - "If I were as light as you, I'd be a lot faster!" - said to Gobi Lo

Castrato - we're all glad he's back as hash cash but Octopussy has embezzled all hash money to Taiwan

Chatroom Paedophile - competition on the hash. "No no, I was in FRONT of 3FM!"

3FM - in front of Chatroom when heading up the hill then wrong turn and got lost

Inflato and Yummy Mummy - I hope whatever x-rated photos they have will never see the light of day so that Inflato can keep his job

Inflato - CX has to cancel their international $100 million marketing campaign "Going the extra mile for you" because of the BJ pictures

Chatroom Paedophile - caught out at Plover Cove Trail last weekend with Gobi Lo and Lemondrop, 6km left, no water. Have to be rescued by firefighters, medics and the police!

Creme Brulee - interviewed for many jobs, but still doesn't know what to do. "I want to bury my head in the sand and let someone give me a recipe for life!"

Priscilla - broccoli increases sperm count

Paul - cannot accept that Gobi Lo is faster than him

ADWD - lookalike 3FM - If you're approaching 40, you shouldn't do a hard interval training session or you'll get injured. Just ask ADWD

Macau Drunk - looking like a porn star with goatee

Paul - hash name is STILL unknown

Pole Dancer - got so sick at the Free China, swore off hashing for two weeks and now back on LSW

Thermal Dick - Spotted at DB one early morning running without his thermals and only with his jocks!! "It's quite nice to run with nothing on!"

Macau Drunk - for making such a crude action with reference to the above that it cannot be written here

Hares - their previous run ended at a park and had complaints by the park wardens for chalk markings and illegal gathering. Same thing tonight!

DDs from the floor:

Gobi Lo Ho - given by Castrato - using blackberry to write DDs. I'm just following in the footsteps of Hopeless

Yummy Mummy - given by Inflato - threw away her nurse costume. It's sacrilegious...

Hares - given by Paul - no flour markings for a long stretch on trail

All the men - given by 3FM - have to keep a moustache in September for "Movember", a moustache-growing charity event

Macau Drunk - given by 3FM - for having a head start with moustache-growing

The circle was closed with a DD to the hares for an excellent run.

The song was sung by the hares, Thermal Dick, Macau Drunk and Priscilla.

Hang Hau to Po Lam 110817 8.83km 108min