Hares - ParkNShop and Parkie
If you ever plan to motor west,
It takes a long time to become young... one starts to get young at the age of sixty and then it is too late.
The night started off like any other Valentine's Day run with the LSW: hared by the Parkies and out of the HK Cricket Club. The consequences of repeated spousal haring have manifested: one title, regular runs over the beloved February Hallmark holiday and discount couples membership at one of the more welcoming Gweilo clubs in Hong Kong. The hash, naturally, benefits tremendously from this arrangement, but discussion of the wonderful amenities offered post-run must be deferred in favor of the run itself.
The scribe, having arrived late as usual, took off in a dead sprint up the usual stairs by the now-closed Shell station, only to be greeted with an unmarked closed check no more than 20 meters into the run. Given the recent weather (the hares having explained at the beginning that they could not recce this weekend), the check was clearly solved by going in the exact same direction as the last HKCC Parkies run. The deja vu thus began.
After following trail for a little bit, hitting a dead end after missing a check and beginning his way up the stairs, the scribe started running into a few of the wimps taking their time on the long staircases ahead. Old Sock, making an appearance on the LSW due to close proximity to his house, was taking the stairs slowly, and explained that he would be doing the wimps "so I don't need to do damn Jardine's Lookout again", referencing last Sunday's Repulse Bay KOTH. Newcomer and true hash virgin No-Name Jane was found on the catchwater with a few other runners, and HP Salsa was found shortly after resting at the split, looking for someone to share company with, as he was heading up the wimps.
As Old Sock predicted, the Rambos split headed directly up Jardine's Lookout and down to Mount Butler road, with nary a check to be found. What was found, however, were a few curious "R66" markings, a very chatty Bondi Barbie, and several FRBs who clearly were taking it easy after KOTH. Dr. Evil labored his way up the stairs with no particular hurry, and Gobi Lo Ho stepped gingerly down on the descent, not willing to rush Any Fanny'll Do (EADWDF). At Mount Butler Road, the MRBs started to segment again, with Macao Drunk and the long-lost iPrick leading the pack (behind the FRBs Ninja Winja, Inflatadate and Flying Fux, who presumably were in 20 minutes earlier).
After 6.81km by Hopeless's GPS ("It should have been 6.66km!" said a Satan-worshipping Parkie), the garage was again in sight, and the best part of the run began: warm, fully-stocked showers and jacuzzis. After everyone cleaned themselves up the pack headed in at 9:00PM (not earlier, lest the Parkies' HKCC friends witness what company they keep) to enjoy pitchers of beer, large portions of fish, chips, beef, cheese pasta (for the pastafarians), plain pasta (for the vegan), glasses of bubbly (for the non-drinkers who whinged about prices), and absolutely positively no rhubarb crumble (Gobi Lo Ho was barely consolable).
The Circle, as led by Hopeless:
The Hares - For the run!
One DD in, and Parkie hijacked the circle to explain the R66 markings as Route 66, given his recent 66th birthday. Segueing effortlessly into Valentine's Day, he then took a joint DD with his bride ParkNShop, proving that occasionally marriages last. Occasionally. The circle was then handed back to Hopeless
ParkNShop and Inflatadate - NZ Week! No one cared, though.
ParkNShop - 2:14 time on the KOTH half.
Ninja Winja, Inflatadate, Old Sock - running the KOTH half.
Gobi Lo Ho, Kuntshy - running the KOTH full.
Dr. Evil - running the KOTH full, and solidly breaking Bobbledick's 6 year-old record, in the rain
Virgins - New runners on LSW
Returnees - Old Sock (since it's near his home), and Comes by the Window Six Times (possibly by herself?)
Dr. Evil and Old Sock - For spending far too much time after the run in the "Cozy Jacuzzi"
Valentine's Day DDs: Parkie for buying his beau a rose, and not a "meat pie" like Hopeless
Freewheel (Ninja Winja drinks as a LaL) - I don't actually know what this DD is for, but it just says "Vacuum Cleaner"
Veggies and Vegans - No meat, fish, cheese, or life
Castrato - For refusing to wear the Hash Cash apron in such a "posh place"
Kuntshy - For swearing profusely and excessively in such a "posh place"
Freewheel (NW LaL) and Wanchai Wanker - Hopeless is NOT your IT Support
Kuntshy - For trying to explain RAM and processor impacts on computer speed to Freewheel
Gobi Lo Ho - For the look of absolute dejection upon hearing there was no Rhubarb crumble
Macao Drunk - Possible next Hash Cash, given his OCPD-like behavior on how to stack bills
DDs from the floor:
Ninja Winja to Old Sock - Apparently, Old Sock was sharing in graphic detail about how his "thingy" was too large for Japanese "thingies". The scribe humbly suggests that "automobile" and "parking space" fill those blanks to avoid an image as unpleasant as the atmosphere after that DD was given.
Buttfan to Hopeless - For wearing "homosexual" tights
The song was sung by the Parkies and the vegetarians.