LSW 1770 Cyberport


Hares - Sticky S3x Toy & Toilet Spray

The Run

So it seemed that the Little Sai Wan hash was having a series of bad luck, long(er) runs, people lost, people injured. "Let's ward off these evil spirits" declared Winnebago, and, in agreement with our two other Feng Shui mistresses, the hares Sticky S3x Toy and Toilet Spray, a roast pig was arranged for the B location.

In fact : "Pig signifies sufficient food, material joy, home safety, prosperity, abundance, wealth, fertility and reasonable success in all affairs. In ancient china and also in the west, pig is a lovely animal for those living by the countryside. They are man's best friend, next to the dog. Pig is also an intelligent animal and adorable. In ancient China, having a mother pig at home signifies fertility and wealth abundance for the family, as they could provide a consistent source of income and provide a good living for the entire family".

So there you go, a stiff run from the A of Cyberport to mystery B, with safety guaranteed by our own pig. In fact tonight not a single hash crash, just some thorny scratches on Bondi Barbie, and some wheezing from Lost At Sea!

The pack trickled into the "Transport Interchange" at Cyberport in the freezing conditions. The Sturmführer of Park n Shop was hassling our hares as they attempted to hijack and make off with three shopping trolleys, but was finally placated when they were wheeled back to the taxi rank to offload the bags. The perennial latecomers were accommodated as the pack of around 15 set off, led by Castrato.

The hares had found a different route out of Cyberport that even the diehards like Bobbledick were heard to comment on and admire. That led to a cut back into the village below Chi Fu Estate, and to the horse trekking trails. Rambos riverbedding up and across the road where the Wimps were going. Then a rejoin and the long winding tarmac up to The Peak. Super Rambos left for a 3.5km sprint around Lugard Road, with Cheesy Flying Fux long gone by the time the main bunch reached this point.

Rejoin "ALL" on the steps by the toilets at The Peak, and then a long downhill into the eventual finish in HK Park, just behind the Squash Courts, hot showers, softies, beer, and the pig.

Once all were in, including the visiting "Malcolm from Singapore", the pig cutting ceremony took place with our three current injured runners Dr Evil, Kuntshy & Ivana Nucock cutting the pig, despite the reservations of the vegetarian Kuntshy! In the cold the pig was quickly demolished before breaking to the Thai Paradise restaurant off Wellington Street.

Well done the hares, good run!

The photos

The Down Downs by Kuntshy

KS's notes: Not all of these DDs may have been given as such. I've had a lot of Moutai and more than a couple fags at this point, so I'm not sure if I gave all of these, or in this order. I know I punished Malcolm as a look-alike more than once. I think Dr. Evil's DDs were given to him? Oh well. As usual from KS, all of these are far too long to make any sort of use out of them, so here goes:

The Hares - For setting a good, albeit long trail.

Lost in Space (Malcolm used as a look-alike): For loaning his GPS to the hares for a run distance, but draining the battery before they set the trail.

Toilet Spray - For buying Guinness (at over 10HKD/can standard for LSW) for Hares/Assistants (including KS/yours truly)

Motor Mouth: For bitching that the logistics of the On Home were inadequate. Set your own run!

Indyanus - For convincing Bondi Barbie and Mei Not Come to do the Super Rambos, then ditching them on the SR trail (the first time Indy's ever left a man to rot, instead of vice versa)

Hopeless - For, well, something. It's in the DDs but hell if I can remember what for.

Latecomers: Wanchai Wanker, Lost at Sea, Indy

Indyanus - For excessive whinging on the trail ("I hate wet shoes!")

Hopeless - For bragging about ditching Come in my Tunnel and Lost in Space, and trying to get the inexperienced pseudo-circleleader to DD them for it. No racing on the hash!

Non-runners: Ivana Nucock, Dr. Evil, KS, and Winnie

DDs for the Pig:
- Winnie: For insisting on the pig, due to "Bad Feng Shui"
- Ivana Nucock, Dr. Evil, KS: For cutting the pig to ward off future injuries (if there's an injury during the next year, KS humbly suggests that Winnie drink with the injured.)
- Hopeless: For getting a vegetarian (KS) to cut the pig (and the Styrofoam soy sauce container).
- Winnie: The price of pig has doubled since she last checked it.
- Hopeless: When you gave me that last DD, you said it was funny.
- (Note from KS: I can't believe I actually forgot to give this DD, but Mr. Happy Slippers complained that the pig meat tasted "dead". No shit, son)

Ivana Nucock: For injuring her knee on a recce for the HK100Ultra, which caused her to drop out of the HK100Ultra.

- Sticky Sex Toy: For finishing behind Camel on the half-marathon (Three ankle sprains is still no excuse)
- Indyanus: For coming just slightly ahead of Camel (taken out of context, that's still disgusting)
- Someone else I can't remember: For doing the same as Indyanus (not in the notes, KS drank for the mistake).
- Bobbledick: For recruiting for 4 Peaks at the KOTH.

Malcolm and Winnie: Visitor DD (Malcolm is the visitor, Winnie once again brings him along).

Come in my Tunnel: Returnee.

Mr. Happy Slippers: For showing up twice in a row, more than he's done in the last year.

Here, Indyanus gives a few excellent DDs, but I don't remember them, because it's the scribe's job to write these down, not mine.

A couple others also give DDs (I think), but my memory is fairly impaired at this point.

Wanchai Wanker: He is finally employed, and got his own flat.

Bondi Barbie: For having the most excessively large bag to carry from A to B.

HP Salsa: For leaving two of the four racks from last weeks run at his flat, then drinking them before this week's run.

Octopussy: For backing out of haring another run... again. This time, it's the Chinese New Year's Run.

Sticky Sex Toy: For asking for "Strong boys" to carry the DD beer to the On-On.

Indyanus: For taking feminist offense to the "Strong boys" comment, but then asking Lost at Sea, "So did you pay Hash Cash for me yet?"

Filthy Festing Felch Monster (goodness, I can't get over that name): For complaining to Wanchai Wanker "YOU STOLE MY CARROT!" Clearly, Hopeless has been giving more stick than carrot lately.

Indyanus and Bobbledick: For comparing steroidal creams as part of the (Lost at Sea dubbed) "Mutual Cream Appreciation Society"

Finally, the song was sung by the two hashers who are far too quiet to usually get into the circle (a.k.a. the Lamma Boys): Castrato and Macao Drunk



LSW 1770 Cyberport 110112 11.75km 89mins


LSW 1770 Cyberport 110112 Elevations