ANZAC Day run Hared by Indyanus and Strapon Sally
We assembled at Queen’s Pier with a flock of lensmen snapping anything that moved on account that the pier was to be closed to marine traffic from midnight.
There was speculation as to where the run was as we sailed west into the Lamma Channel with Not Important collecting names "Only the rambos" for the obituaries/buddy buddy draw.
Into Sok Kwu Wan and we took our orders assembled on the pier. Some very detailed instructions from the hares with Boilers muttering "this sounds like the longest suicide note in history". Reflective tape markings, T’s are technically check-backs, FRBs to dismantle the false trail, the proper route is within 200metres, buddy buddy system, never get out of earshot, listen for screams of people falling off cliffs, don’t stop in the killing zone…
And we were off… along the quay through the seafood restaurants to the temple and on to the Wimps Rambos split. The Wimps went left up towards the saddle between Mt. Stenhouse and the radio masts on Ling Kok Shan while the Rambos continued on round the bay to the check after the bridge.
Up the hill for a couple of hundred metres, nothing. Back down and try along the flat path, nothing. The hare appeared magically and said it was the obvious route, so we went back through the Free China stylee check to go across the bridge, past the Lo So Shing school and on to the Lo So Shing beach path. Some runners followed the trail all the way onto the beach while the smart money turned left into the reeds towards Mt. Stenhouse.
On up the Mt. Stenhouse ridge with some of the front runners following the two diversions off the path only to return to continue up the hill. A rambos/super rambos split on the plateau before the final ascent and everyone pressed on nearly to the top where there was a T saying the trail was back down via the rambo route.
So the pack inverted again went back down to the split where a group of runners got lost after rejoining the rambos trail and the hare (who was still with us - a real sign of confidence) was sweeping and picking up all the reflective markings. "Very eco-friendly" we said – "F**k that sh*t" said the hare – "this stuff costs $400 a roll".
Now the real fun started as we began a sheer descent down decomposed granite and eroded soil gulleys. There was a commotion behind us at the split with the lost patrol firmly demanding to know where the trail was. There was no longer a trail - the hare was now ahead of them diligently recovering her precious reflectors.
Half an hour of sliding/tripping/falling with the whole mountain echoing the pack’s choicer military expressions we got to the saddle and rejoined the wimps for a very pleasant flat 25minute run round Shek Pai Wan then on home to Mo Tat Wan. Showers on the gin palace then on on to al fresco ‘The Bay’ restaurant thebayhk.com (nee Cococabana).
Very filling with garlic bread, penne carbonara, spagetti, african chicken, paella and chips.
Down downs by Sweaty Snailgobbler
Medals of Honours were presented to:
Not Important and FFFM 1st troops back in.
(Tight Lips and Captain Pubic would have been First in, but Tight Lips deserted Captain Pubic on the Rambo Split and he said stuff the bitch and bolted home)
Hopeless (Managed to survive the battle)
Castrato (wimped out and did the wimps. He was then broken hearted that he missed the Rambo Action.
Boilers for services to LSW above and beyond the call of duty; He supplied the Landing Vessel.
Bite and Suck: Mathew and Paul were on a mission to find white trash and Hopeless was called for advice.
Randy VFF: celebrated 175 runs.
The Hares: selfishly made shirts for themselves.
Not Important: Heartless; Strap On Sally while lost on Stenhouse doing a recy, called him to say where she was and he said don’t wake me when you get home!
Dr. Evil: Intrepid Photographer.
Mr and Mrs Parky: Something about her ginger pussy!
The Wanchai Wanker: Whinging on the run and wanting to call an AGM about the dangers of the run
Indy: She said she was doing her bit for the environment by collecting the trail markings or did she have another agenda? She managed to sneak ahead of Hopeless, Rizwan, Dave and Randy VF who were off trail and steal the trail marking leaving them to wander aimlessly on the mountain. But the crackling sounds of ah ah ah ah …. blew the plot!
Osucka: Accompanied Bobble Dick to the restaurant. We are not sure if Bobble Dick was making ghost faces with his torchlight, but the poor girl was scared stiff and came back talking of all the ghosts.
Virgins: Free Willy, Paul and Mathew
Visitors: All Knockers no Knickers and Pestiferous (hope we didn’t scare them off)
Dave: Who do I have to f**k to get a glass of red wine around here?
Next run 1570 – Wednesday 2nd May, 7pm
Caine Road Garden