Run 1035 Tsing Yi - 28 May 97

Hares - See You Jimmy & Dick the Shit

Write-up - Macau Drunk

A group of about fifteen runners gathered in the park on Tsing Yi. After a stern warning from hare Jimmy to runners who suffer from vertigo or claustrophobia to take the wimps route we set off at 7:10 when it looked like no one else would show up. The group stuck pretty much together out of the park and around a few false trails in the housing estate. Straight forward running up through the bus terminal, up the road to where the wimps rambos split must have been.

None of the front group saw the split, and headed off the road up the trail to the top of the hill on Tsing Yi which shall remain nameless. Hash view and hash slash at the trig point, which afforded a great view of the bridge. Down the other side of the hill till everyone lost the trail at the fence. This brought most of this pack back together again until some of the torches with fresh batteries picked up the trail on the other side of the fence, and a gap under it through a storm water duct. A bit further down the concrete path was the vertigo bit. Four series of fifteen metre ladders down the front of the cliff face.

Panic-stricken Black Shirts assiduously guarding their patch of tarmacadam were suddenly confronted by a horde of sweaty gwailos descending the cliff face. Someone suggested balaclavas should have been worn to really give them a reason to reach for their walkie-talkies

The first group however avoided capture, and after browsing around for a while (ably assisted by the hare) managed to find entrance to the tunnel.

The second group too avoided apprehension and found the tunnel.

The third group of two late starters Special Branch and Pat, however had their collars felt, and were interrogated on why all these people were running around. They politely explained that they were out for a jog and if they weren't released immediately, a lot more people would be back to find out where they were (this was of course a mixture of wishful thinking and idle threat). It seemed to eventually work, but meant the hors d'oeuvres were long gone by the time they got back, and solitary hare Jimmy had been despatched to represent the abovementioned search party horde.

The tunnel run was excellent, with a 1½ km flat run before several minutes of concrete sleeper half-step walking and a choice of various exits. The correct one of course being the least illuminated which no one took. On home through the MTR building site, or around it as in Ian and Bruce's case, taking an unfortunate long-cut.

Back at the bins were all the other late starters who'd missed the rambos split, and were on their third beer already.

The On On was at the chinese restaurant overlooking the ponds. $50 a head, with an extremely enthusiastic (terminally drunk ?) owner who couldn't stop shaking Peterhile's hand and slapping his back. It was all getting dangerously near the tongues stage.

Down downs splendidly presented by Keith

Tick Tock - a little too enthusiastic press-ganging all and sundry to fill the receding hareline; beware barstaff, waiters & arbitrary lurkers.

Peterphile - macho civil servant broke a nail opening a can of beer.

Tom - griping about the choice of beer, and being a self-confessed chopstick maestro.

Rodger - naturalist who called the police to remove a snake, but saw it bludgeoned it to death instead.

Melissa - bar-dancing at Carnegies with 16 year old toy-boys.

MENSA 3 - showing the Cantonese a thing or two about cuisine, pouring syrup into his sweetcorn soup.

Peterphile - chatting up old Chinese waiters abandoning his predilection for young boys.

Amah Perks - being on the right trail for the rambos but giving up the search early.

Rizwan - dedicated hasher & die-hard romantic (going on the hash and planning to meet up with friends afterwards - the same evening his girlfriend was flying out of Kai Tak for a week).

Melissa - Aussie ball-gown squeeze over so no more worries about avoiding beer.

Bruce - U.S. navy visitor.

Rizwan - telling porkies to a caller (probably his girlfriend) on his mobile at the on-on, saying he was still out on the run.

Rodger - techno-geek having a digital camera at the hash.

Tick Tock, Amah Perks & Big Bitch - unable to agree on the hash run number.

Poltergeist - 7 eleven runner and dobbing Iain in for the same.

Iain - 7 eleven runner - Tsing Yi was convenient as he works across the road.

Special Branch & Pat - returnees after an absence of 2½ hours.

Special Branch - new shoes and boasting their cross country suitability (little did he know).

Elizabeth - concerned spouse - Pat who ? pass the noodles and another beer please.

Dick the Shit - concerned co-hare after CU Jimmy had gone out sweeping - Jimmy who ? noodles etc. as above.

Marlise - flashy new shoes.

Keith - went to Bali for his 40th, was late back and thought of blaming it on CX engine trouble, then forgot his better half in Jakarta in the process.

Dick the Shit (drinking for the still absent Jimmy as well) - semantic slip up in the directions to the start, after it was determined the ferry pier wasn't "adjacent" any block of flats. Inconsistent use of flour - the first markings were exploded bags of flour, while the rest of the trail consisted of whatever dust was left on their hands.